Yesterday I was suppose to not use my email or social media until lunch, but by the time I realized my challenge for the day, I had already used social media. I didn't want to cheat, so I decided to switch it with day 11 which is to evaluate my commitments.

At the moment I would say I am only committed to two things: this 30 day challenge and finding a job. When I started this challenge it really was to help me build momentum. I felt I was in a rut with nothing to do. I wanted this challenge to give me a fresh start and to help me on the path to becoming a productive adult. In the beginning it was great. I found myself very focused and learning everyday as I completed a challenge. As the days went on I realized that sometimes my life got in the way. I would want to spend time with my friends or I had things to do that made me neglect the challenge. The challenge ended up not being a priority or something that I was excited to do, which is why I don't write a post everyday. I feel I'm just trying to finish it now out of obligation, but I hope that I can continue to learn something.

Finding a job is pretty self explanatory. When I went to visit my old job, they gave me a lot of tips on how to find a job and interviewing skills. This is more meaningful to me because I really need a job. It seems more important to put my time and energy into this than blogging everyday for the challenge.

I'm tired. I now realize why you're suppose to do one challenge every day, but I procrastinated and today I did three. As far as beauty products go, I don't wear to much. For skincare I will wash my face with a face wash, apply my toner, and then moisturizer. If I have a pimple I'll put a spot treatment on it and that's it. The same thing applies for makeup. I don't wear makeup on a daily basis anymore. When I do wear it I'll use concealer, do my eyebrows, apply mascara, blush, and lip balm. If I'm in the mood I'll wear eyeliner, but I hardly am. I do make a conscious effort to buy products that are cruelty free because I don't think makeup and skincare is worth the suffering of a helpless animal.

Just because I don't wear much makeup, doesn't mean I don't have any. My freshman year of uni I went a little crazy and bought a lot of makeup. I was insecure and thought I needed it to feel good about myself. As I've gotten older I've become a lot more confident and realized I really don't need makeup. As long as I am happy with myself other people's opinions of me with no makeup don't matter.

As I was cleaning out my makeup collection I realized I had so much that I never really used and didn't plan on using anytime soon. I ended up getting rid of some eyeshadows, lipsticks, foundations, and blushes. It's kind of sad because makeup cost a lot of money and I ended up taking out some really expensive stuff. From now on I will only buy what I need and know I will wear.

I was suppose to write this yesterday, but I didn't. I ended up spending the whole day with people instead of being in solitude. Yesterday was my last day in Irvine, so I decided I would use it to see people I wouldn't see for a while. I met up with my friend Rachel for brunch at Peet's Coffee. Rachel got a job with Yelp in San Francisco and I knew I wouldn't see her for a while. We got a coffee and a pastry, talked about postgrad, and gave each other a see-you-later hug. After that I went to my college job to say goodbye to my old supervisor, coworkers, and friends. I thought I was only going to be there for a couple minutes, but I ended up being there for about an hour and a half. Everyone was happy to see me and wanted to know what I had been doing for the past two months. They were very helpful and gave me tips on how to find jobs and how to practice my interviewing skills. I'm really glad I got to spend time them. After I spent the whole day at the apartment cleaning with the rest of my roommates. We ended pretty late and I didn't get home until 9 p.m. I couldn't write this post yesterday because I was never alone. It isn't that I don't enjoy solitude, it's just when I'm around people I like to make the most of it. I'm learning to go on my phone less, talk to people, and be appreciative of the time we spend together.

Today, I ended up spending the whole day by myself, and it was very different than yesterday. I ended up doing exactly what I wanted to do and felt I needed to accomplish. I find that when I'm alone I get a lot of work done. Today I wrote the two missing blogpost I had. I didn't even bother watching TV or going on social media because it's just a waste of time. I spent the day with my thoughts. Later, I will downsize my beauty collection and do some yoga. This isn't much of a challenge for me because I've already learned to enjoy solitude. I like to spend time to myself; I think it's healthy for me to do so. I know some people struggle with this because they feel lonely. I'm alone the majority of the time, but never lonely. If I'm to accomplish what I want, I need to be able to do it alone without having to rely on others. I think I've learned how to balance being alone and spending time with people.

I'm bad. This post was suppose to go up two days ago, but when you're busy packing and moving out of your college apartment there isn't much time to blog.

At the moment, I am only reading three books: A Dance With Dragons, Making Magic With Gaia, and Nana. I'm not the kind of person that likes to read multiple books at the same time because I end up not finishing them. My goodreads profile is really helpful in keeping track of the books I read. I decided to not take my bookmark off those because they're only three.

I didn't realize that I actually had a lot of bookmarks on my laptop. It was kind of overwhelming. I started with my bookmarks bar. I had a lot of things for uni like where to print online at the library, pdf's for my articles, paying rent, how to format an essay in Chicago style, and my Greek homework. I deleted all of them because I knew I would never use them again.

Then I went to my other bookmarks. I had about six folders and a bunch of lose articles. My travel folder consisted of lots of links of where to travel, studying abroad, and why travel is good for you. I ended up deleting sites that were no longer there, pages I didn't need, and would never look at. I pretty much only kept the links of places I would like to travel to in the future. To be honest, I forgot I even had so many travel bookmarks. I ended up deleting my fashion folder, downsized my life folder to only the important articles I'd read again, and deleted a folder for one of my classes.

This challenge took forever just because my computers really slow, I had a lot of bookmarks, and I opened every single one. I'm glad I did it because now when I look at my bookmarks I know it will only be filled with what I really need.

The first thing I do when I wake up is check my social media accounts. I'll go on Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, and Youtube, but today I decided not to do that. Since I'm back in Irvine moving, I couldn't do everything that I would like to do in a morning routine. If I was back at home I would, meditate, spend time with my cat, make a cup of tea, eat breakfast, and take a shower. Instead, in my half moved college apartment I grabbed a chair and sat on the patio to meditate. The whole year I lived here I've only gone out to the patio to do laundry, but as I sat there all I could see where these bright green trees with no cars in sight. It was quite beautiful.

Last night in my dream my ex was in it. I had messaged him to meet me, he did, and deleted me, kind of like what happened in real life. The dream bothered me and as I was meditating I noticed my brain would always wander off thinking about it. Meditating made me realize how the thought of him is something I think about and bothers me. At the end of my session, when I opened my eyes and saw the trees, I felt calm and at ease.

I hope the rest of the day will be felt like that. I will be moving, packing, and eating In-N-Out with Gaby.

This post was suppose to go on yesterday, but I was busy packing and having fun with my friends at the 626 Night Market that I'm doing it now. I've actually spent some time thinking about what I really need to prioritize since the termination of my relationship. Here they are:

1. Get a job. Not just any job, but a good paying full-time job where I can use my degree.
2. Live a healthy lifestyle. For me that includes: meditating, reading, writing, and spending less time on my phone.
3. Be a better mom.
4. Stay in contact with my friends.

For the first, I really don't like the fact that I have nothing to do. I like being busy and working. To be honest, I also need money. The second is pretty obvious, but the third is in regards to my cat Moty. Since I've moved back home, I've given more of my attention to my phone than to my cat. It should be the other way around. For the last one, I tend to like being alone and having time to myself, but sometimes people take that as not caring. I do care about my friends and perhaps I need to show them that by reaching out to them. I'm only going to do this for my close friends, which are four to five people. Everyone else doesn't really matter.